4/26/09
One last show then the week is done. I'm backstage at the Improv in Vegas now; just finished the 11th show. The shows have gotten much better since my last entry; I knew I'd figure out the room, and I did.

I think I also booked a private show here in May, so that's also good news.

I gotta tell ya, these last few days I've felt really bad-ass. My friend Aaron flew in from Philly and we've been hanging out around town. Well, I knew I had a few connections, so I used them to hook us up...but little did I know exactly how many connections I had and how cool my connections really are.

It started when Aaron asked if he could get a ticket to see Terry Fator because he is a huge fan and knows that I write for him. So I called my contact over there and not only did Aaron get a great seat, we also got to see a rehearsal of the show, and Aaron met Terry and got a great souvenier. Aaron was thrilled and I was excited that I could hook a friend up like that.

Then we went to the Piano Bar here at Harrah's where The Dueling Piano Twins play...and who also happen to be friends of mine. So we go there, get in for free, hang out with some cool, hot girls and had a great time.

Again, it felt great.

Then today we go to see my friend Kevin who manages a steak restaurant at The Golden Nugget called Vic & Anthonys. I figured it was a nice place and Kevin said he'd hook us up...little did I realize that "hooking up" meant treating us to one of the best meals I've ever had in my life!

Filet, Ribeye, crab cakes, quail and an amazing desert with a name so fancy I don't remember it. It might've been called, "mmmm", because that's what it made me say over and over and over again.

Just an amazing meal. If you're in Vegas, make the trip. I don't think Kevin will hook you up, but it's worth the cost...trust me!

But again, it was just so bad-ass to be treated like that. And I could tell Aaron was impressed. And not that it's about impressing my friends, but it's nice that guys I grew up with who knew that I wanted to do comedy can see that my success has gotten me pretty far.

Well, the headliner is just about done so I need to go close the show and do the little meet and greet.

I'll talk to you guys later.

Oh yeah, if you're in the South Florida area, come on and see me this week at the W. Palm Beach Improv! Later.

Shit, I almost forgot about the other cool things...

This week a lot of my comedy friends were in town, one of them is John Hefron who stopped by the Improv to say hi. Aaron recognized him and got his pic with John. Pretty cool.

Later in the week, we're walking down the Strip when I see this Asian guy standing next to Aaron. And, if you've been to Vegas, you know that Asian guys are not rare at all. But this one looked really familiar...despite him wearing sunglasses and a hat (at night). Then it hit me, I said, "William", and he turned to me for a second and then looked away.

It was William Hung.

I leaned to him and said, "I'm not going to embarrass you, I just want to say hi." He said, "Thanks" and walked off.

I didn't get my picture with him like last time, but it was still cool.

And lastly, I went to see the Legends show at Harrahs for free because my buddy is the drummer for the show. And I got him into my show...THAT really felt "Rat Packy".

OK, now I'm done with my bad-ass Vegas story. Time to start show #12...

4/22/09
I gotta tell ya, I'm really not enjoying theses shows so far. Going first in Vegas is always tricky, but this week is just shit. I don't get it.

Last time I was here, it took me a few shows, but I got the rhythm. This time, I just can't figure it out.

And I'm watching the headliner now, and they're loving him. Then again, anyone could follow the show I just did.

The feature act is killing too...that's one of the problems. He's a really good comic/performer. He does juggling, comedy and a lot of high-energy bits. So I have to go out after him and do another 10 minutes...how the fuck am I supposed to do that? I actually said, "This is so weird. 'Hey Flip, we've got this amazing comedian who's going to go out there, juggle blades, balance boxes and 20 minutes of non-stop, high energy comedy that's going to bring the audience to a frenzy. After he's done, go out there and bring the show to a grinding, fucking halt!' - 'You got it!'"

That got a great laugh. The only big one I got...or maybe it just seemed that way.

My last joke...which is my new favorite joke to tell (The Japanese McDonalds commercial joke)...just sat there like a lump of shit. Nothing. Not a fucking laugh...and I have to say, "Thank you, g'night."

I know this sounds like such a crutch, but opening in this room is just so awkward. I'm not a good opener for this room. There are some really great comics who are masters at hosting a show; I can, but not in this room.

Vegas is such a mixture of so many people because it is such a tourist destination. If I was middling, I know I could do better. Because I could do a solid, 20 minute, top-to-bottom set. Not a 5 minute set at the beginning and a 10 minute after the feature.

I honestly don't know why they structure the show that way. It's usually always, host does 10-15, feature 20-25 and headliner 45-60. Here, I understand they have to keep the show to 1:05. Fine. Let me do the 15 up front, they bring up the feature and then the headliner.

Oy...

I'm just venting right now because I literally just came off of the stage. I'll be fine in a bit. Actually, I'm going to have to go back out there and close the show. Then I have to go in the front of the house and meet and greet these people who fucking hate me.

That's so humiliating.

Then again...fuck them. You know what, fuck'em.

I know I'm a good comedian, if I'm not their taste, fine. But I'm not going to let a shitty show get me down.

I just got this surge of "fuck'em". Seriously, I'm all good.

You know what, next week I'm flying to Florida to headline the West Palm Beach Improv. And don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to say, "I shouldn't be hosting anymore because I'm headlining."

I've always said that I'll never be above hosting because it keeps me humble and it's always a good skill to keep fresh....these last shows maybe the exception, but still...

I was just saying that if the W. Palm Improv is headlining me, then I really have to be a pretty good comic. So fine Vegas, if you want to shit on me now, cool.

Let the poop fall where it may.

I really need to put my ego aside...

But watch, tomorrow night I'll have killer shows and say, "I love Vegas!!!"...God willing.

But for now, 'What Happens in Vegas...I sure as fuck hope that it stays here."

4/18/09
What a lazy, fucking Saturday it's been. I've honestly been doing next to nothing today...well, I did clean a bit, but I haven't left my apartment yet...so I feel lazy.

But the past two days have been absolutely fantastic. I've been spending time with my girlfriend and it's been so great. I can't tell you how lucky I feel right now.

She is really a great person; so much fun and such a good heart. Again, I feel lucky to have just met her let alone date her.

You want to know how cool she is?

I met her as Skippy Greene and she still wanted to talk to me. :)

Actually she's just as fucked up as I am, so it's a good fit. And yes, she's Jewish.

So it's been a fun couple of days.

If you've been reading my blogs for awhile, you know how I've lamented about relationships for...well ever. So now that I'm in one (and a great one at that), I'm trying to keep all of those voices that creep up on me in times like this.

You know; those self-sabotaging voices that tend to whisper in your mind. And to tell you the truth, those voices have been progressively quieting down.

And before you start thinking I'm some sort of schitzo, I don't mean "real voices" like crazy people hear, but just those doubts that come up after being fucked over so many times. Those thoughts that say, "something's gonna fuck it up" or "hurt her before she hurts you"...it's so sad that those thoughts even entered my mind, but as I've said so many times, we are all products of former relationships. Not just romantic either; family, friends, co-workers, etc.

But like I said, those thoughts are not really there anymore. It's very liberating, exciting and scary all at once.

OK, change of subject before I get anymore cheesy...

I've uploaded some video from my Iraq trip, check'em out. I'm gonna do some more cleaning...yippie!

___

4/12/09
Greetings all...I am finally settled back in my apartment after a (truly) whirlwind experience in Iraq & Kuwait. I have a shitload of pictures and some videos that I will be uploading ASAP.

So since I couldn't blog on my site while I was there...I didn't have access to my computer so I could update my site...I emailed myself a daily blog when I could.

So, here are 5 blogs from Iraq, enjoy:

  • 4/2/09
    Hi all, greetings from Kuwait. I'm going to be blogging as much as I can while I'm over here...unfortunately I don't have a way to upload it to my site while I'm here, so by the time you all read this, I'll already be home.

    So far today (the first day) has been all about traveling. I left the morning of April 1 and arrived the evening of April 2. So bizarre when I do that...not that I time travel all of the time. At least my nose isn't bleeding or anything...that would be a reference to LOST. Nerd!

    We do our first show tomorrow, but so far, just seeing the soldiers here and knowing that I'm actually here in Iraq, well that's just been pretty emotional already. I can't imagine what I'm going to feel when I actually see the troops in the field.

    I can't write too much more now; there's a line for people to use the computer and let's be honest...they're more important things than writing blogs now.

    I hope you guys had a great April Fools and I'll talk to you later.

  • 4/3/09
    Hey all, I got another chance to email entry, so I took advantage.

    Right now I'm getting ready to do my first show with Mark Sweeney and Scott Kennedy (the other comics) at another base. Can't say where, sorry.

    My body is still adjusting to the time change, I think I'll be right by tomorrow.

    Today we got a briefing and the colonel who spoke to us was really cool. I can't tell you how proud this is already making me feel. And talking to some of the soldiers has just made this even more rewarding.

    We haven't gone out to the smaller bases that we're going to be playing, I'm sure the reality of the situation will hit me a lot more than it is now. To be honest, so far this is pretty easy, as far as traveling and conditions. From what I'm told, soon we're going to be moving at break neck pace and staying in less than desirable conditions...of course we're staying there for one day, the men and women here are staying here for months, even years at a time. So much stronger than I could ever be.

    Let's be honest, I'm fucking spoiled and lazy.

    Well, I don't want to take up the computer time much longer, so I'll bid you all adue...or a don't, whatever. :)

  • 4/5/09
    I am tired right now. Today we flew to our gigs on blackhawk helicoptors, it was kick ass! Although before the flight I had a hot dog at a barbeque at one of the bases. Not a good idea...

    The pilots gave us a little example of what the blackhawks can do as far as manuevering and firepower. Holy shit are they cool!

    But the hot dog did not quite enjoy it very much and I was (Iiterally) 2 inches from puking. The two inches would be in my throat. The only thing stopping me from puking was me thinking to myself, "There's no way in hell I'm going to throw up in a blackhawk helicoptor in front of military people." Shit, I already look white as a ghost, I don't need them calling me a pussy on top of it.

    Yesterday was an exhausting day...I flew on a C-17 from Kuwait into Iraq and was pretty much moving for 18 hours. Fucking spent! But I got a good nights sleep and tonight we're staying at a place where soldiers come to recooperate, so it's very nice.

    I gotta tell you, spending time here and seeing the conditions that the soldiers live and work in really puts things in perspective in so many ways. I mean last week I was pissed because my hotel didn't have wifi...meanwhile there are people living in metal boxes (2-3 to a box sometimes) in the middle of Iraq fighting for my freedom. Fuck wifi! Fuck traffic! Fuck gas prices! I've got it good!!

    I know it sounds cliche and all, but the troops are amazing. They don't question it, they just do it. I feel honored and humbled to be here. And then when they say, "Thank you for coming and bringing back a little bit of home. It really made me smile"...well shit, that's just what it's all about.

    I'm going to get going; grab some grub and talk to a soldier or two. I hope you guys are smiling and remember that even though you can't see them, there are brave men and women working halfway around the world to keep you safe.

    And this goes for every country's military.

    And I should say this too; I'm a passifist. I believe in violence only as a last resort. I don't believe that we should be at war...but I will always, ALWAYS, support the troops. God bless'em, everyone!

    Merry Christmas!!! Sorry, got confused. But Happy Passover and Easter. :)

  • 4/8/09
    Right now I'm stuck on a base because of bad weather. I'm hoping that we get out soon so we can do our last show tonight.

    This past day has been one of the most rewarding. We've been hanging with Marines and they are just the coolest, baddest mother fuckers you could ever meet.

    I got to fire some weapons yesterday...let's just say that there is a lot of dirt that won't be giving me any trouble. I am a horrible shot, but I still felt manly!! I'll try and post some video when I can.

    I don't have long on this computer so I'm making this short. This has all been so amazing and it really is life changing...I'm just ready to get home. But I'm sure every single person here feels the same way...only I'll be home in 4 days, most of them have months to go.

    Never take for granted what you have.

  • 4/9/09
    Well we are back in Kuwait and the tour is pretty much done. Tomorrow night we fly back to the states. I can't believe it's already over.

    This has been life-changing in so many ways; mostly, it's shown me that I need to keep things in perspective. Don't take living in American for granted. I've seen how the soldiers live and have heard stories of how the locals live and lived.

    On a lighter note, today I did one of the coolest fucking things ever. EVER!

    We're getting ready to fly back to Kuwait and the C-130 (that's a cargo plane) lands and picks us up. Well, there was no one nor nothing else on the plane, so the crew chief asked if I'd like to sit in the cock pit.

    Fuck yeah!

    So I go up there and I meet the captain and co-pilot. We're talking and the co-pilot asks if I know a comedian named Vinnie Cappolla...

    Fuck yeah!

    Vinnie is one of my closest friends in comedy and he's also great friends with the co-pilot. So this is already cool as hell. So we take off and once we're airbourne, the co-pilot and I are talking some more when the captain says, "Flip, since you two are kinda close already...(meaning, the co-pilot and I have a mutual friend)...let me ask you this, have you ever handled a stick before?" "Huh?" "Have you flown a plane before?" "No sir." "Would you like to fly now?"

    FUCK YEAH!!!!

    I flew a C-130 plane. No auto pilot, nothing. Me! Me! ME! Now I didn't do any manuevers or land or anything, and it was only for a few minutes, but still, it was exhilerating! And I did a pretty good job too. :)

    Just an amazing adventure this whole trip has been.

    Well, I've got to do some laundry and I think I'm going to take a nap. A little beat now.

    I hope all of you have experiences like this in your life. That's what life is about; just experiencing new things to keep you stimulated and motivated. And this trip has been so many amazing experiences. And meeting all of the troops that I've meet here has been beyond amazing. To all of you reading this, just remember that there are men and women over here who are risking their lives and leaving their families to keep us safe. And they are not all the ones in the big bases, there are little, tiny bases that I've seen where there are only a few hundred people who live in shitty conditions, working their asses off. At night, just remember these people, I know I will.

So that is it...my trip in 5 blogs.

It really was an amazing time. Unfortunately, it ended on a quite somber note.

On the plane ride back from Kuwait, there was a young soldier on our plane who passed away on the flight. And after experiencing everything that I had, it broke me up more than it would've before the trip. So tragic...and I'm not sure exactlyl what happened to the young man.

Didn't mean to close this out on a downer, but I wanted you all to know the extent of the experience; the good and the bad.

On a completely different subject...I now have a girlfriend. :)

...and no, this is not a belated April Fools joke. More on that later, I'm going to eat now.

God bless America!